I'm too Smart

• I'm Too Smart
• A first grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Johnny what is your problem?"
  
  
  Johnny answered, "I'm too smart for the first grade. My sister is in the third grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third grade too!"
  
  
  The teacher had had enough. She took Johnny to the principal's office.
  
  
  While Johnny waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.
  
  
  The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first grade and behave. The teacher agreed.
  
  
  Johnny was brought in and the conditions are explained to him and he agrees to take the test. Principal: "What is 3 x 3?" Johnny: "9".
  
  
  Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Johnny: "36". And so it went with every question the principal thought a third grader should know.
  
  
  The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Johnny can go to the third grade."
  
  
  The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions" The principal and Johnny both agree.
  
  
  The teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?" Johnny, after a moment, "Legs."
  
  
  Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Johnny replied, "Pockets."
  
  
  Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?" Johnny: "Pants"
  
  
  Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement?" Johnny: "Firetruck"
  
  
  The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Johnny in the fifth grade, I missed the last four questions myself."
  
  
  Http://Www.Skoola.Com/Read_gist.Php?Id=+56
• Posted by JP Williams on 2010-08-21

The Temperature of Hell

• 
  The Temperature Of Hell
• A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question:
  
  
  "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with a proof."
  
  
  Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however wrote the following:
  
  
  First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
  
  
  As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.
  
  
  With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
  
  
  Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.
  
  
  So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.
  
  
  Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.
  
  
  It was not revealed what grade the student got.
  
  
  http://www.skoola.com/read_gist.php?id=+65
• Posted by andy chuks on 2010-08-26